Thanks to Repeater for making the original PvZ Rap Battle series, allowing me to get the idea of creating this.
Yo, medieval loafer! I'm the swag of ALL!
What about you? You're just lacking of a "Roll"!
I've heard jokes about you, you're just serving a king.
That's what I hear everyday.
You're just in a knighted play.
I have a ****ing Mansion, you just have a house!
Seriously, you are pathetic like your comrade's sick horse.
Speaking of which, where is it anyways?
Whatever it is, you're getting wrecked, 420-blazes.
So what on earth are you talkin' about, lol?
I'll have you know, my rank is royal.
You're only rich in your flipping dough.
Y'know what, just eat till you're LOW!
Get that pun, lad?
That's one of my latest ones,
Oh let me see what you can do, oh wait, you can't make one!
Well, what's wrong, with your ****?
I didn't ask you to interrupt!
Because you're corrupt!
Now, try beat this born rapper!
Both a noble, and a slayer.
Now that that abomination's gone,
Kids, here's a lesson, don't play with "El Knighte".
Oi! You dare insult me, the unholy Paladin of Zomland?!
Shut up, before you get executed, for your land, is now MY land.
Wait, that's a joke
For you're in no way comparable
To the modern world!
Where gallant deeds ain't gonna do ye good!
Just saying the rhymes, will make me win!
See, this be what watching raps does to me, you bin!
Your helmet, it's as WORTHLESS AS DIRT!
But I say, it's even worse than that!
For it can be mixed up with faeces
And you will awe, at my famous DIAMONDS!
Well, my prison's filled with criminals
Ready to face executions
How about I put you, into the gallows?
Blast it, maybe something worse can be done by my executioners,
For they will destroy you.
And they will plunder the entirety of your light-blue.
Oh yes, if you don't get the "light-blue" part,
It's mainly your big, but pathetic diamonds, getting wrecked.
However, who won?
Get out of here, primitive counterpart.
You're only worth to get a blast.
Not exactly a REAL party,
but to be blown by my cannons!
Pfft, damn cannons, taste LASERS!
Shoop, da, woop, BOOMS!
Stop with those incessant noises,
Even though they're not hearable
Here, in my beautiful ice block,
It's more DURABLE than both of your house locks,
And I'll say, in the meantime, I've raided your home!
Diamond, I've took all of your diamonds!
And Knight, all of your gold and precious rewards have been stolen,
Even your sick horse, has been raided by me!
I know my rhymes don't even rhyme,
But who needs rhymes when you interrupt, "El Knighte"?
Now just a second, my cannons are all a-goner!
Hah, serves you right! For mine lasers are in an impenetrable barrier!
Diamond, those barriers were weak against my fists.
Now that've I stolen all your loot,
It's now time to eat kebabs!
Also, you'll all get the boot!