Here it is, the very first part of Plant Fortress 2.
Meet the Gargantuar
[The Gargantuar walks up to the camera and places his telephone pole on a vanquished Tall-nut and sits down in a chair]
Gargantuar: "I am Heavy Weapons Zombie...and this [grabs pole] is my weapon. [lays both hands convetously on the pole] She weighs one hundred fifty kilobrains and turns plants into $200 custom-tooled pancakes at 10,000 plants per minute. [looks intently at viewer] It costs $400,000 to use this weapon...for twelve seconds."
Gargantuar: [Laughs]
Gargantuar: [Checks the top of his pole] "Oh my god, who touched Sascha? Alright...Who touched my club!?"
Gargantuar: "Some plants think they can outsmart me. Maybe, [sniffs] maybe. I've yet to meet one that can outsmart Imp."
Gargantuar: [holds up an Imp to the camera as the sound of Gargantuar Prime shooting his laser eyes is heard]
[Gargantuar devastates the plants with his telephone pole on Greenbowl Stage 1 Cap 1
[Plant Fortress 2 theme plays]
Gargantuar: :"Waaaaahhhh! Uwaaaaaaah! Ahahahahaha! Cry some more!"
[Pause]
Gargantuar: "Heheh, cry some more."
[Plant Fortress 2 ending flourish music plays]